Reading the curious incident of the dog in the night-time (2007-01-14)

"'...[Y]our father is really pacient [sic] but I'm not, I get cross, even though I don't mean to.'" --Mark Haddon, the curious incident of the dog in the night-time

None of the traits I've observed in people I know are anywhere near as upsetting as the behavior of Christopher Boone, the narrator of the curious incident of the dog in the night-time. An old letter from his mother describes this:

And Mr. Land was realy [sic] nice about it but there were boxes and bits of broken bowl on the floor and everyone was staring and I saw that you had wet yourself and I was so cross and I wanted to take you out of the shop but you wouldn't let me touch you and you just lay on the floor and screamed and banged your hands and feet on the floor and the maniger [sic] came and asked what the problem was and I was at the end of my tether and I had to pay for two broken mixers and we just had to wait until you stoped [sic] screaming.

The adults in Christopher's life act and react differently to his behavior. His mother was much less patient than his father, but his father later ends up apologizing and making amends. His mentor is the most admirable, explaining to Christopher the unwritten rules of social behavior--the "hidden curriculum"--in precise literal terms:

Siobhan understands. When she tells me not to do something she tells me exactly what it is that I am not allowed to do. And I like this.

Criticism of the book suggests that the narration is too self-aware for even a high-functioning autistic at Christopher's age. So the traits I've observed in people I know are much less upsetting than the symptoms of various disorders.

In fact--in years as an engineer, graduate student, or software developer--I've explained to significant others that I don't want them to take offense when I am in hack mode, a state of hyperfocus likened to ADHD characteristics. So I understand different ways of thinking that lead to social differences.

Nevertheless I got cross with former subconsultants and friends. I expected empathy, explanation of feelings, repairing of feelings, social time, mature social relating--expectations that may worsen social anxiety. I don't like my reaction; I'd rather have the patience of Siobhan.